The Julias of My Life

I remember when I read the first chapter and had so many thoughts about Julia’s role in Jason’s life. In the very beginning, the scenes in which Jason hyper observes (subconsciously, more or less) his sister’s life -- when Julia has her music “thumping out dead loud” or when Jason eavesdrops when she has that phone conversation with her boyfriend Ewan -- felt especially familiar to me. I have two older brothers who I used to simultaneously admire and hate. They were the Julias of my life: I watched from the window whenever one of them drove away with their girlfriend to hang out for the night (like when Julia and Stian leave for Edinburgh in his car), I stole their iPod shuffle whenever they left the house -- yes, the one that had like one Paramore song, a Kelly Clarkson song, and like 70 J-Pop songs -- (like Jason blasts Julia’s Roxy Music L.P. in the beginning of Bridle Path), and I wanted to speak just like them.

Just as Jason admired Julia for speaking so eloquently and being woke on political issues, I always looked up to my brothers for knowing exactly what to say at the right time. The older of my siblings, Richter, is about 13 years older than me. So, especially during his high school years, he and my parents always got into “correction arguments" where he always won. As Julia could “make other people do whatever she wants with words”, so could Richter. Also, Jason picked up on things that Julia said or did as a form of wanting to be like her -- because she’s the cool older sister, Jason looked up to her regardless of whether or not he wanted to admit it. For example, she notices that Jason eavesdropped on her conversation over the phone with her boyfriend, and she confronts him about it. She notes, “If you had any friends to phone, Jason, I wouldn't listen in on you. People who eavesdrop are such maggots.” From this point on, Jason names his inner voice of subordinacy “maggot”. This goes to show just how much he takes in every word his sister says to him, and how simple phrases that she says resonate with him because of how much he admires her.

This admiration, although it is somewhat suppressed as they have sibling quarrels throughout the first parts of the book, turns out to benefit their relationship. The ending scene really hit my heart as Julia did everything in her power to comfort Jason while moving out of his house and watching their Dad leave with his mistress. Julia, as we’ve often discussed in class, was much more in the know about their parents’ unhealthy relationship and situation with the divorce. She also seems to acknowledge that Jason is at an age where he is going through physical/emotional changes, and with every other stressor of his life, he can be especially vulnerable, scared, and sad. With this, Jason notices that Julia tries to “cheer him up” by asking about Eliot Bolivar and reminiscing on childhood games. This is telling in that she 1) notices and knows about what holds importance to him, and 2) has developed a relationship with his brother that is so much stronger than only one year previous. The amount of trust that resonated from the second January Man chapter was so starkly reciprocative to the standoffishness that Julia had towards Jason in the first January Man.

Reading that contrast in their interactions with each other reminded me of when Richter left us for his job in Tokyo, and Richard, my brother that is eight years older than me, was off to college when I was 10 years old. I had no idea what having a corporate managing job in a company’s headquarters in Japan meant or what the prospect of college entailed, but I did know that things in our house were changing fast. Not having them around would mean my figures of security and guidance would be lost, and it was right after we had developed these tight sibling relationships on a family trip the summer prior. Just as Jason and Julia’s relationship peaked right before she left, my siblings and I felt the same togetherness just before they left. However, I also was comforted in the fact that I knew they would only be a phone call away, there for me with all of the advice and care in the world. So as I read the last words of this book, I hoped that Jason knew that he could call up Julia in any situation he found himself in because she seems to really listen to him now. And who knows, maybe Stian -- her boyfriend with a Porsche --  will now be the one eavesdropping on Julia’s phone conversation with Jason as he spills the tea on the Neal Brose of his new school. Things may change, but older siblings are for us there no matter what life brings, whether it’s family issues, a new Fleetwood Mac LP, or a broken calculator.